


but it's you i'm tired of craving

by chanyous_height_difference



Category: TOO | Ten Oriented Orchestra (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, But don't worry they figure it out, Friends to Lovers, M/M, almost all of this is set in a mc donald's and i don't know why, also this is soft but what did y'all expect, hello i am back feeding the other four people on board of this ship, oh and chan's really and i mean really insecure about his feelings, there's some trouble because they're both oblivious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:06:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27340183
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chanyous_height_difference/pseuds/chanyous_height_difference
Summary: Five times Chanhyuk's friends bother him about confessing and the one time they don't have to.
Relationships: Cho Chanhyuk | Chan/Kim Jeyou | J.You
Comments: 5
Kudos: 38





	but it's you i'm tired of craving

**Author's Note:**

> Oh my god, I'm finally done!!!!! God, this took me so long. I actually started this three months ago at the beginning of August, but then I hit a massive writer's block and ended up deleting half of what I had already written. And after finally figuring out how to proceed and being able to continue writing, I visited my grandma, moved from my home to my dorm, had my introduction week for university, and experienced several short but intense phases of writer's block. But I am done now and I'm actually pretty happy about how this turned out :D Also really enjoyed finally writing all of the other boys!!! Until now, they only had short appearances or mentions in my fics, but I had the chance to add them properly in this one, which was really nice. Anyways, catch me on Twitter @jeyoustinyhands if you wanna talk and I hope you have a nice day/night ♡ Enjoy reading!!!!
> 
> Title is taken from Big Chance by SuperM. A freaking bop if y'all ask me, I love that song so much.

**1**

“For fuck’s sake, Jeyou. Stop. Eating. The fries. They aren’t for you.”

“Yeah, and why not? I made them, I should be allowed to eat them. Besides, who else do you want to give them to? It’s 1am, I don’t think someone’s going to walk in here in the foreseeable future.” With that, the younger leans back against the deep fryer, stuffing another handful of fries in his mouth. Chanhyuk lets out a deep sigh and rolls his eyes.

“The point is that you shouldn’t have made them in the first place. You’ve been working here for _t_ _hree_ _months_ , you _know_ that the food is for the customers, not the employees.” He says, grimacing when he realizes that he sounded exactly like his mum.

“But I’m hungry.” Jeyou whines, dragging out the last word. There’s a pout forming on his lips and now, Chanhyuk’s even more annoyed, because _how is he able to look this adorable in a fucking McDonald’s uniform?_

“God, sometimes I regret that I ever started talking to you.” He grumbles. Jeyou just laughs and walks over to where Chanhyuk is lounging around at the counter, jumping onto it and tucking one leg up to place his chin on his knee.

“That’s a lie. You love me.”

Sadly, he’s right. Chanhyuk _does_ love him. He doesn’t know when his feelings for Jeyou turned from _best friend_ to _the love of my life_ , only that he’s been pining for the younger for almost a year.

It doesn’t help that he’s known Jeyou for as long as he can remember. Growing up next to each other in an apartment building with no other children practically forced them to be friends, but Chanhyuk can’t say that he regrets their relationship. It’s just not really convenient for him and his romantic feelings. He knows what Jeyou looks like after waking up in the morning, knows how scared he was of coming out, knows how much he hates some of his family members. Chanhyuk knows how much music means to him, knows which video games he’s good and bad at, knows how soft and small he looks in Chanhyuk’s clothes. Thousand little details about Jeyou are saved in his brain and every time he remembers one of them, he falls more in love.

The sound of the door opening pulls him out of his thoughts, and when he turns around, he sees a familiar figure walking towards them.

“Hey hyung! How was work?” Jeyou greets Jaeyun when he arrives at the counter.

“As shitty as ever. Some drunk girl puked in one of the aisles fifteen minutes before my shift ended. Sometimes I hate the fact that I need this job.” Jaeyun complains. He works at the convenience store next to the McDonald’s and comes over every time he has the night shift. In the three months that Chanhyuk and Jeyou have been working at the fast food place, they became pretty close with him, and Jaeyun’s a good friend now.

“Oh god, that’s gross.” Jeyou shudders, his face scrunching up in disgust. Chanhyuk lets out a laugh at the younger’s expression before turning to Jaeyun.

“Are you taking the usual?” He asks, grinning at Jeyou when Jaeyun nods.

“ _Now_ you are allowed to make fries.” He gestures in the direction of the deep fryer, watching how Jeyou jumps down from the counter and walks over to the machine, sticking his tongue out when he passes Chanhyuk. Not being able to look away, his eyes follow Jeyou’s figure until the younger is back at his work station, a soft smile forming on his lips when he sees the concentrated look on Jeyou’s face.

“You should tell him.”

At Jaeyun’s words, he whirls around, just to look back at Jeyou not even a second later to check if he heard anything. When he finds the younger still focused on his work, he lets out a relieved sigh before glaring at Jaeyun.

“No. We talked about this. I’m not risking the friendship we have.” He hisses. Jaeyun just rolls his eyes, an exasperated expression on his face.

“Hyung, you’re not going to ruin anything. I told you, I’ve been watching you two, and I’m like ninety percent sure he loves you too.”

“Yeah, but ninety percent aren’t one hundred. And I can’t risk losing him. He meant the world to me even before I fell in love.” Glancing back at Jeyou, Chanhyuk can’t stop the smile that spreads on his face when he finds the younger looking up at the ceiling, softly humming an improvised melody. Focusing on Jaeyun again, he continues.

“It’s just… He’s the most important person in my life. I don’t know what I would do without him. And I can’t lose him just because of my dumb feelings.” At that, Jaeyun’s eyes soften a little, and he gives Chanhyuk a small smile.

“I understand that, hyung. And I know that this is _your_ life, not mine. But you’re an idiot fo-”

“I agree with that.” Jeyou interrupts him, sliding a massive serving of fries over to Jaeyun before taking his place on top of the counter again. The grin he gives Chanhyuk is teasing, and the older can only roll his eyes at Jeyou’s antics.

After that, they just talk for a bit. Jaeyun tells them about the kids he teaches at a singing academy during his daytime job while Chanhyuk and Jeyou give him updates about the songs they’re writing right now. Exchanging stories and joking around, they spend almost an hour together before Jaeyun finally says his goodbye.

“Say Hi to Chihoon from me!” Is the last thing he tells them before he’s walking out of the door, waving at them one last time.

“Bye!” Jeyou yells after him, turning to Chanhyuk when Jaeyun disappears from view.

“Alright, we still have an hour left of our shift. What are we going to do?” He asks, curiosity in his eyes. Chanhyuk just grins at him.

“I can tell you what we’re _not_ going to do. And that’s eating all of the fries.”

**2**

“Honestly hyung, your crush is getting pathetic at this point.” Woonggi says as soon as Jeyou leaves the kitchen to go to the bathroom. The boy dips one of his chicken nuggets in ketchup while giving Chanhyuk a judging look.

“Woonggi, shut up. Chan-hyung doesn’t have a crush. He’s completely in love already.”

Great. Just when he thought Kyungho is someone he can trust.

“I hate to agree with them, but they’re kinda right.” The last person of the trio adds. Sungmin gives Chanhyuk an apologetic smile before stealing one of Woonggi’s chicken nuggets. Chanhyuk just sighs and contemplates banging his head on the counter.

Don’t get him wrong, he loves the three with his whole heart. Ever since they entered the McDonald’s for the first time after one of their study sessions in the library above the fast food place, he decided to adopt them as his little brothers. But sometimes, they’re way too observant and _definitely_ too honest.

“What do you mean _kinda right_? From what hyung himself told us, he’s been pining for a year now. And even if he hadn’t said anything, the heart eyes would’ve been a dead giveaway.” Woonggi replies, sounding almost _offended_. Chanhyuk snorts. The only person that has the right to be offended right now is Chanhyuk himself.

“Are you done discussing my love life?” He asks, voice dripping with sarcasm.

“I’m sorry, but you staring at Jeyou-hyung twenty-four-seven without telling him how you feel isn’t a love life. It’s just sad.” Sungmin delivers the last blow. Chanhyuk rolls his eyes and lets out a slightly annoyed sigh. It’s only half past nine, which means that it’s still way too early in his shift for him to deal with shit like this. Normally, the idiocy only starts at around midnight when the place slowly empties out and Jeyou decides that he’s bored.

“What are you talking about?” Speak of the devil and he shall appear. Jeyou slides into the spot next to Chanhyuk, handing the customer waiting behind the trio a cheeseburger.

“Chan-hyung’s crush.” Kyungho says before Chanhyuk can stop him.

“Oh.” Is Jeyou’s only answer, and when Chanhyuk turns to look at him, there’s a sadness in his eyes the older can’t quite place. But then he blinks, and the expression is gone so fast that Chanhyuk isn’t sure if he didn’t just imagine it.

“Yeah, _Oh_. Hyung’s too scared to tell him how he feels.” Woonggi says with a devilish grin on his face, and as much as Chanhyuk loves the boy, right now he just wants to kick him out.

“Even though he really should, because watching him being whipped and hopelessly in love is getting annoying.” Kyungho continues, completely ignoring Chanhyuk’s threatening gaze. Jeyou is just watching the exchange curiously, a small smirk on his lips.

“So please tell him that he should stop being a coward and just confess.” Sungmin adds, and this time, Chanhyuk really lets his head fall onto the counter. The trio on the other side giggles, and he can feel how Jeyou places a comforting hand on his shoulder. When he looks up again, the other is giving him a soft, understanding smile.

“I’m not going to put pressure on you for anything you don’t want to do. Confess when you’re ready, and let these little know-it-alls suffer a bit longer.”

The answering screeches and complaints make Chanhyuk laugh while Jeyou sends him a wink, mischievous smirk on his face.

After that, the subject dies down a bit, the trio deciding to complain about homework and little free time instead. Jeyou and Chanhyuk send each other amused looks from time to time, both entertained by the dramatic renditions of the high school life.

It’s around ten when the three younger boys decide to leave. Taking their backpacks, they say their goodbyes. But before they go, all three turn to Chanhyuk, mouthing various versions of _Tell him!_ in his direction. Jeyou doesn’t miss it, and the look in his eyes tells Chanhyuk that it’s not going to be long before the younger is going to address the subject.

And he’s right. A few hours later, the place is completely empty, and Jeyou uses the chance to hop onto the counter again, looking at Chanhyuk with a pout and faked betrayal.

“Why didn’t you tell me that you have a crush on someone? And here I was, thinking I’m your best friend.” He says with false hurt in his voice, eyes twinkling with amusement. Dramatically placing a hand on his chest, he tilts his head and directs his best puppy eyes at Chanhyuk.

“Come on, why didn’t you say something? Is it because it’s someone we know?”

And even though he tries not to show a reaction at that because the younger’s guess is _so close_ to the truth, he can’t stop himself from flinching the slightest bit. Jeyou’s eyes widen, definitely not missing the small movement, and a bright grin spreads on his face. But there’s something off about it. Chanhyuk just can’t tell what.

“So I’m right. It _is_ someone we know. Who? Jaeyun-hyung? _No_ , Chihoon-hyung! I bet it’s him. You’re always together and you look at him with this super soft expression in your eyes. Of course it’s hyung! How could I miss this?” The younger rambles, waving his arms around in the air. He sounds excited, and even though he’s _so, so wrong_ , Chanhyuk smiles at how adorable he looks right now.

The younger continues to spin his theory, Chanhyuk just watching him with a small, affectionate grin on his face. He feels kinda bad for letting Jeyou believe that he’s right and knows that he should probably stop him before the other is completely invested in the idea. But a part of him thinks that this is better than the truth. If Jeyou thinks Chanhyuk is in love with Chihoon, he isn’t going to realize that in reality, it’s him the older wants.

“I think you’d make a great couple. You’re both freaking annoying sometimes.” He eventually concludes, only laughing when Chanhyuk’s insulted gaze lands on his face. After that, Jeyou drops the subject, satisfied expression telling Chanhyuk that the younger thinks he’s got everything figured out. He decides that he’s going to keep it that way.

They go back to their usual pointless banter in no time, talking until their shift ends before walking to their apartment together. And it’s only hours later when Chanhyuk lies alone in his bed, staring up at the ceiling, that he finally realizes what was wrong about the smile Jeyou wore the whole night.

It was way too bright to be real.

**3**

Minsu’s gaze is disgusted as he watches Jisu eating his burger, fingers twitching to pull his laptop and the notes they took for their project away from the slightly older boy. It’s a pretty entertaining picture and Chanhyuk has to suppress the laugh that threatens to escape him. A hand on his shoulder makes him turn away from the spectacle that is supposed to be Jisu’s and Minsu’s course work and his gaze lands on Jeyou, looking up at him with his phone in his hand.

“My dad just called me, he’s looking for some stuff… I don’t actually know. Is it okay if I leave you alone for a moment?” He asks. Chanhyuk lets his eyes wander over the place. Aside from Jisu and Minsu, there are only some other students and an older woman inhabiting the room, and Chanhyuk decides that it’s okay if Jeyou leaves for a minute. He gives the younger a warm smile and a nod. Jeyou grins back before turning to leave, and Chanhyuk’s gaze softens even more. He looks back at Minsu and Jisu just in time to see them exchanging knowing glances.

“What?” He wants to know, voice sounding exasperated because he already has an idea of what’s going to come.

“When do you want to tell him?” Minsu asks, nothing but curiosity in his eyes. Chanhyuk sighs.

“Preferably never.” He replies before running a hand through his hair and shrinking behind the counter. He really doesn’t feel like being the target of his friend’s pitying eyes.

“What else do you want to do? Wait until he falls out of love with you, finds someone else, and then wallow in self-pity?” Jisu decides to join the conversation, words as blunt as ever.

“He has to be in love with me for that to happen.” Is Chanhyuk’s only answer. He expects the discussion to be over after that, but instead, he gets surprised, shocked, and judging looks from his friends.

“Please, are you kidding me? Jeyou looks at you as if you personally hung the moon.” Jisu says at the same time as Minsu screeches, “Are you serious right now?” Chanhyuk just shrugs, not knowing how to react. It’s already the third time in not even two weeks that his friends decided to comment on his feelings and also the second time they told him they are reciprocated. It’s confusing, and he has no idea how to respond to it.

As if hearing his inner turmoil, Minsu places a soft, comforting hand on his arm, looking directly at Chanhyuk and giving him a reassuring smile before he continues.

“He’s in love with you. And I know that we just met each other three months ago, but I can tell. _He loves you_. And even if he doesn’t… You need to get these feelings of your chest. They’re hurting you, everyone who knows you even a little bit can see that. Hyung, you have to let this go at one point, and the best way to do that is to tell Jeyou, regardless of the outcome.”

Jisu only nods affirmative, apparently agreeing with Minsu. And so does Chanhyuk. In some small, dark corner of his brain, he knows that his friend is right and that he has to face his feelings at some point sooner or later. He just wishes he wouldn’t have to. When he tells his friends that much, Jisu only rolls his eyes.

“Hyung, you can’t run from your feelings forever. They’re gonna catch up and bite you in the ass someday. You know I’m not the best at this stuff, at least compared to Jaeyun or this guy” He gestures in Minsu’s direction, “but you and Jeyou are my friends. Which means that I want both of you to be happy. And I have never seen you as happy as with each other. So _please_ , stop being a coward and stop denying yourself and Jeyou the thing you both want.”

Then they both smile softly at him. And Chanhyuk hates how the little spark of hope Jaeyun put in his heart a week ago grows and grows. He can’t afford himself to hope. If he does, the rejection is only going to hurt more. And still, the small flutter in his chest doesn’t cease.

Maybe it’s said hope that brings him to his next decision. Maybe it’s the memory of Jeyou’s bright smile or the way he fits perfectly into Chanhyuk’s arms. Maybe it’s the fact that he’s one of the few people that never left Chanhyuk’s side, no matter what happened. Whatever it is, it makes him say his next words.

“Okay. I’m going to think about it.”

It’s not even a concrete yes, but Jisu and Minsu still look more satisfied than they should. The older of the two even breaks into a small applause, the grin on his face sarcastic and pleased at the same time.

“This is great. I went into this conversation expecting nothing and now we’re here. That’s what I call progress.” He says, voice so serious that he really could have fooled Chanhyuk if it wasn’t for the happiness and the pride in his eyes. Minsu next to him starts laughing and Chanhyuk really can’t hold back his smile any longer. It’s at that exact moment he hears the back door open, and when he turns around, he finds Jeyou walking towards them.

“And, did you figure out what your dad wanted from you?” He asks. Jeyou grins and takes his place next to Chanhyuk again.

“Yeah, and he even managed to find it with my help. But why are _you all_ looking so happy?” He wants to know, leaning over the counter to direct his curious eyes at Jisu and Minsu. There’s a small teasing smile on his face and Chanhyuk finds himself looking at Jeyou a little bit longer.

“This guy over there is finally ready to at least think about… something important.” Jisu answers while Minsu points at Chanhyuk. Jeyou’s smile turns even more mischievous and there’s a slightly amused glint in his eyes when he turns to Chanhyuk.

“Is this about your crush?”

Chanhyuk’s glad that the younger is looking at him and doesn’t notice the surprised expressions on Jisu’s and Minsu’s faces. He sends both of them a glare that hopefully conveys the message of _Don’t say a single word_. Then, he shrugs.

“Yeah. Everyone keeps telling me that it’s not as unrequited as I think it is, so… Maybe I’m going to confess.” He answers and watches how Jeyou’s smile turns a little unsteady. The sadness Chanhyuk saw a few days ago returns for a moment, but just like last time, it vanishes as fast as it appeared. And just like before, he doesn’t know if it was real.

“That’s great! Just promise me that you’re not going to make out with him in front of me.”

As soon as Jeyou stops talking, Jisu doubles over with laughter and Minsu starts giggling. Jeyou’s smirking at him, one eyebrow raised, and even Chanhyuk can’t stop himself from letting out a chuckle.

“Promise. No making out in front of my best friend. What about making out _with_ my best friend though?”

And _okay_ , that wasn’t supposed to come out of his mouth. In the background, he can hear Jisu’s and Minu’s laughter getting louder, but his main focus of attention is Jeyou and the way he blushes. For the smallest moment, he looks surprised and even a little bit happy. But just like the sadness Chanhyuk is pretty sure he imagined, the expression disappears after not even a second. Then, the teasing smile is back on his face.

“I don’t think the person you want to confess to would like that very much.” With that, he winks at the older, turning back to their still laughing friends. And Chanhyuk can only look at him, fond smile on his lips and heart beating loudly in his chest. He kinda hopes that Jeyou would like making out with him.

**4**

The next person that pesters him is Chihoon not even a week later. And he has the audacity to do it in Chanhyuk’s own home. Admittedly, it’s also Chihoon’s home, but that’s not the point here.

The older is leaving his room while Chanhyuk is sprawled out on the couch in the living room of the apartment he shares with Chihoon and Jeyou. When he comes back from the kitchen, his eyes land on Chanhyuk again, and then, he’s making his way over, placing the water bottle he fetched from the kitchen on the coffee table, and throws himself on the cushion next to Chanhyuk.

“What’s with the concentrated face?” He asks, voice half worried and half amused.

“I’m thinking.” At that, Chihoon lets out a snort.

“Yeah, I gathered that much. I was more curious about _what_ you’re thinking of.” The older answers before he adjusts his body so that he can prop himself up to look down at Chanhyuk. Letting out a sigh, he decides to answer.

“I had a talk with Jisu and Minsu a few days ago. And one with Jaeyun before that. They all told me that my feelings for Jeyou aren’t as unrequited as I think they are.”

And okay, he really didn’t know what kind of answer to expect from Chihoon, but for the older to start laughing definitely wasn’t it.

“Unrequited, are you kidding me? Jeyou is head over heels in love with you, the same way you are with him.”

Grinning down at him, the older reaches up to playfully pet Chanhyuk’s hair. The groan he gets in return only makes him smile wider.

“I wasn’t even finished. I wanted to say that I thought about what they said and that maybe, I’m going to confess. Emphasis on maybe because what if you’re all wrong? I don’t want to lose him, especially not because of something so dumb.”

“Hey, no, your feelings aren’t dumb. You fell in love and there’s nothing bad about that. But I can see where your fear is coming from. You and Jeyou have been friends practically your whole lives and I know that he means more to you than maybe every other person in your life. It’s completely understandable that you’re scared of losing him, but honestly? I agree with the others. The chances of him rejecting you are close to zero.”

Chihoon smiles warmly down at him and Chanhyuk can’t stop the answering grin that spreads on his face. He’s still not sure if he really wants to go through with the whole confession thing but he has to admit that all the reassurance from his friends does make him feel hopeful and like _maybe_ it is not the worst idea.

“And for the highly unlikely case that he really rejects you: There’s some guy in my composition class who thinks you’re hot.”

Chihoon starts laughing as soon as he sees the offended look Chanhyuk sends him.

“I’m just saying.” Is his only reaction to it, smile even brighter than before. Chanhyuk rolls his eyes, but he can’t stop himself from smiling back. He feels better than before, Chihoon’s words pulling him out of his thoughts and cheering him up a bit. When he tells his friend that much, Chihoon only plops his chin down on Chanhyuk’s chest and throws his arm over the younger’s waist in a lazy attempt of a hug.

It’s in that moment that the apartment door opens. Chanhyuk can see Jeyou entering the place, most likely coming back from his meetup with Kyungho, Sungmin, and Minsu. The boy kicks off his shoes and he’s just about to walk into his room when his eyes land on Chanhyuk and Chihoon on the couch.

The happy look on his face slowly melts away and gets replaced by a sad nostalgia Chanhyuk can’t quite place. There’s hurt in his eyes and Chanhyuk can see the way his lower lip trembles. He knows his best friend good enough to see that Jeyou’s going to start crying.

Before he has the chance to ask or even just greet him, the boy leaves the hallway in a desperate hurry. Chanhyuk hears Jeyou’s door fall shut and the key turning in the lock. The confusion must be visible on his face because when he focuses on Chihoon again, the older just shrugs, his expression telling Chanhyuk that he, too, has no idea what just happened.

“I’m gonna try and talk to him.” Chanhyuk decides, and Chihoon nods, standing up to let Chanhyuk leave. He walks the few steps to Jeyou’s room, softly knocking at the door. He doesn’t get an answer, and even when he tries again, no sound comes from the other side.

Letting out a sigh, he goes back to the couch and lies down again. Chihoon went back to his room and so, Chanhyuk continues staring up at the ceiling for the rest of the afternoon, head full of his friend’s advise and encouragement.

Later that day when all three of them meet in the kitchen to eat dinner together (a tradition they have since moving in together), Jeyou still looks a little sad and distressed but better than he did a few hours ago. With a shy, reassuring smile, he explains to them that he forgot an important document he promised to fill out for his mum and that he panicked a little bit when he realized.

Still, Chanhyuk can see the discomfort and the fear in his best friend’s gaze when their eyes meet. But after thinking about it for a moment, he decides to wait until the other is ready to tell him about whatever is troubling him and chooses not to comment on it. The same way he doesn’t say anything when Jeyou distances himself from Chanhyuk when the older sits down next to him.

**5**

Jeyou has been avoiding him for almost two weeks now. Chanhyuk doesn’t know why. Doesn’t know why the younger leaves a room when he enters, why he seems to have an excuse ready any time Chanhyuk asks him about a songwriting session, why he fakes being sick just so they don’t have to work together.

“I don’t know what’s going on and I can’t fix it if he doesn’t talk to me!” He complains to Donggeon, voice agitated and louder than normally, now that there are no chances of Jeyou hearing him. His friend is looking at him, part sympathy, part pity in his eyes. The expression is enough to make Chanhyuk deflate, draping himself over the counter.

“I have no idea what to do.” He finally admits, voice full of defeat. Donggeon takes a bite out of his burger before he sighs.

“Why don’t you tell me what happened the last few weeks? I can try to see where something went wrong. Maybe an outsider perspective is going to help.” He says, sounding a bit pained and like he made peace with his fate. Said fate being a supportive friend for Chanhyuk. And even though his voice doesn’t give the impression, the younger can see in Donggeon’s eyes that he’s actually concerned for his friends and that he truly wants to help. So, he decides to answer.

“Okay, so, a few weeks back, we were working. And then, Jaeyun came to visit. We talked for a bit...”

And then, he recounts everything he remembers from the last weeks. But it’s only when he comes to Chihoon being the seventh person to try and give him relationship advice that Donggeon raises his hand in a move that tells Chanhyuk to stop talking.

“Hold on a sec.” He says, face looking almost irritated.

“So, you and Chihoon-hyung were talking. While basically cuddling on the couch. After Jeyou guessed that you have a crush on Hyung just a few days prior _and_ finding out that you were thinking about confessing.”

Chanhyuk doesn’t know what his friend is getting at, but he nods regardless, waiting for Donggeon to _please_ elaborate the point he’s trying to make.

“Chan, he’s jealous. And probably really hurt too.” The other finally says, voice sounding exasperated but sympathetic, a soft, caring smile on his lips. For a moment, Chanhyuk can do nothing but stare at him, frown on his face. To him, Donggeon’s words just make no sense.

“Why should he be jealous? He knows that I’m affectionate with my friends, and he also knows that that includes Chihoon-hyung.” He replies, knowing that his irritation must be visible on his face. Donggeon sighs again, this time managing to sound unbelievable done with Chanhyuk.

“Because he thinks you’re in love with Hyung and that you confessed to him. Meaning he believes that you are in a relationship now. Which hurts him because he has feelings for you.”

Donggeon is looking at him as if everything he just said is totally obvious and it makes Chanhyuk feel unbelievable dumb. He gives his friend a helpless little shrug, not knowing what to do.

“What do you expect me to do with that? You don’t even know if it’s true.” He finally utters, and he can’t stop himself from sounding a little angry. All of his friends telling him that Jeyou’s in love with him too and urging him to confess makes him feel supported, but also so confused and unsure, especially when they all say it so easily. They can do that, because it’s not them who could lose their best friend, the person that knows them better than anyone else does.

He truly hates how complicated all of this is.

“What I want you to do is go to Jeyou, explain the situation, and tell him that you’re in love with him.”

For a moment, it’s silent, and then, Chanhyuk opens his mouth, ready to remind Donggeon that _maybe_ , Jeyou doesn’t feel the same way about him. Before he can say something, his friend raises his hand again and continues talking.

“No, no, no, no. Don’t say it. Just because _you’re_ too blind to see it doesn’t mean that everyone else is. Jeyou is in love with you, Chan. Has been for years if everything Chihoon told me is true. And it’s really sad that apparently everyone knows except for you.”

Donggeon’s voice softens the longer he speaks, his eyes taking on a warm, comforting expression. Chanhyuk kinda wants to continue being angry, but it’s honestly pretty hard when the other is looking at him like that. He lets out a sigh and Donggeon gives him a comforting smile, gently placing a consoling hand on Chanhyuk’s.

“You don’t have to believe me if you really don’t want to. But regardless of if Jeyou has feelings for you or not, you have to talk to each other. If you continue like this, it doesn’t matter if you confess. Because keeping this up leads to you losing him anyway.”

Chanhyuk sighs. He really hates how right his friend is. Donggeon isn’t the best at the whole feelings and pep talk thing, something he has in common with Jisu. But they both have their moments, especially when it comes to their friends. And then, it’s hard to disagree with them. Their words become so true and sometimes even harsh, but they’re always meant as comfort, support, and help. So yeah, Donggeon has a point, as much as Chanhyuk doesn’t want to admit it.

“I know.” He finally replies, because there really isn’t much else for him to say. To his own surprise, he feels tears prickling in the corners of his eyes. Frustrated, he wipes his sleeves over his face before giving Donggeon a sad, watery smile.

“I know.” He repeats, tone defeated. The older is looking at him, eyes so warm and tender and consoling, Chanhyuk feels like he’s really going to cry at any moment.

“Hey, Chan. I know that this whole thing is, well… pretty shitty. For both of you. But I bet this isn’t the first fight you ever had and it’s also not going to be the last one.”

Chanhyuk nods, listening intently to what his friend has to say. He honestly has no idea what to do anymore and at this point, he’s desperate for any kind of advice. His only wish is to have Jeyou back, to see his smile again, to hear him laugh, to listen to his rambling and his dumb jokes. He wants his best friend back, and he’s ready to do whatever it takes. Even if that includes talking.

“I don’t have to tell you that communication is the most important thing in every kind of relationship. You have to ask him what’s wrong, and if he tells you, you two can solve whatever it is. I know you can, because I know _you_. Like, honestly. I’ve never seen two people as perfect for each other as you and Jeyou.”

And _that_ , _that_ makes Chanhyuk finally crack a smile. Donggeon reciprocates it before he reaches over the counter to give Chanhyuk’s shoulder an encouraging nudge.

“And while you’re at it: Tell him that you love him.”

The older’s tone is teasing, but Chanhyuk can see the soft smile on his lips and the honesty in his eyes and knows that his friend is serious about this.

Honestly, he still doesn’t know if he’s really going to go through with it. He wants to, desperately so. Wants to yell out into the world how much Jeyou means to him, how happy the younger makes him, how Chanhyuk wants nothing more than to kiss him. And with every passing day, it’s getting harder to hold all of his feelings in.

But the little voice in his head can’t stop screaming about how he’s going to lose Jeyou and his friendship if he says too much.

He sighs and gives Donggeon a warm smile, hoping that the gratitude he has for his friend is showing in his eyes.

“I don’t know if I’m going to do the latter, but I’m definitely capable of talking to him. You’re right, we _can_ figure this out. I am going to get my best friend back!”

He grins brightly at Donggeon, who lets out a laugh, and for the first time in two weeks, Chanhyuk thinks that _maybe_ , the whole situation is going to work out.

**+1**

Nothing is working out. Three days have gone by since his talk with Donggeon and Jeyou is still avoiding him, at this point not even trying to be subtle anymore. The whole situation makes Chanhyuk feel all kinds of things. Frustration. Incompetence. Hopelessness. Anger.

He tried to find the right moment to talk to Jeyou, but it never came. Which is why there’s still nothing but silence between them while they work today’s shift. Jeyou’s excuse of being sick only worked for that long, and now, he’s back at work, still giving Chanhyuk the cold shoulder, still avoiding every situation where it’s not absolutely necessary for him to touch or talk to the older. And frankly, it slowly but surely is pissing Chanhyuk off. Especially because Jeyou is almost _rude_ while doing it.

Just like right now.

It’s the end of their shift, they’re just leaving the McDonald’s through the back door after their co-workers took over. Chanhyuk’s standing in the alleyway, watching how Jeyou closes the door, contemplating if this could be the right moment to ask the younger what’s going on. But before he even comes to a decision, Jeyou’s already walking past him, bumping into his shoulder.

“Sorry.” He mumbles, not even looking at Chanhyuk and just continuing on his way.

And Chanhyuk doesn’t know what it is. There wasn’t any force behind the clash and with the way Jeyou was trying to avoid touching him throughout the whole day, it wasn’t even _intentional_. But the small gesture is suddenly the last straw for Chanhyuk. He whirls around and catches up to Jeyou with fast steps, taking a hold of the younger’s wrist and making him turn around.

“What exactly is your problem?” He spits out, watching Jeyou’s eyes widen in surprise before they turn angry. He rips his wrist out of Chanhyuk’s grip.

“I don’t have a problem.” He hisses. Chanhyuk can’t stop the sarcastic smile that takes over his face when he hears the words.

“Of course not. You’ve been avoiding and ignoring me because you have no problem at all.”

His voice is venomous, and for a moment, he can see hurt in Jeyou’s eyes. But then, the younger’s anger is back, his expression looking furious and stone-cold at the same time.

“Just tell me what you want.”

“My best friend back.”

Chanhyuk’s voice comes out softer than intended, a desperate edge to his words that lets the helplessness he tried to hide behind his rage shine through.

What he doesn’t expect is that the statement seems to make Jeyou even angrier. The younger steps closer, fire in his eyes when his gaze meets Chanhyuk’s.

“No, you don’t.” He says, emotionless voice a complete contrast to the many feelings flitting across his face.

“And do you know why? Because you don’t want _me_. You have Chihoon-hyung now. You have your perfect relationship while I have to stand at the side line and watch you being happy with someone else. The same way it’s always been.”

Jeyou’s words cut through Chanhyuk’s heart like a knife. His whole body feels like it’s on fire, his brain still trying to catch up with what the younger is saying. The only thought he’s really processing is that _Donggeon was right_.

He can only watch as Jeyou’s cutting demeanor slowly melts away, how he shrinks into himself and averts his eyes, an undescribable mixture of sadness, vulnerability, hopelessness, and affection taking over his face. He gives Chanhyuk a soft, shaky smile.

“I’m in love with you, Chan-hyung. For many, many reasons. Because you make fun of me when we watch horror movies, but you still let me hold your hand and hug you when I’m scared. Because you let me win at video games when you knew I had a bad day. Because you try to bake me a birthday cake every year, even though you’re horrible at it. Because when you smile at me, it feels like nothing else in the world matters. I’m so fucking _gone_ for you, and you don’t even realize it. Since I’m only your best friend and could never be the person you want to kiss.”

Chanhyuk can only stare at Jeyou while the younger talks, words not really registering in his brain. The whole situation feels too good to be real, and still, he knows that none of this is a dream.

Letting his eyes wander over Jeyou’s face, Chanhyuk takes everything in. The way the younger’s eyes glitter in the dim light of the street lamp shining into the alleyway. The way his hair falls into his eyes. How his lips are still curved in a soft, careful smile. And then, Chanhyuk can’t stop himself any longer.

“But I _do_ want you.” He blurts out, feeling how the blood rushes to his cheeks.

“I _do_ want you. And not just like _that_. I want to hug you and place my chin on your head because you’re the perfect height for me to do that. I want to hold your hand when we go grocery shopping. I want to play with your hair while your head lies in my lap. I want to be the reason you smile so bright that you hide it behind your hands even though you shouldn’t do that because your smile is _beautiful_. I want to kiss you and tell you how much you mean to me because yes, you’re my best friend, but you’re also the person I’m completely and utterly in love with.”

Jeyou blinks up at him as if he doesn’t understand what Chanhyuk is talking about. He looks dazed and a little bit lost, and admittedly, it’s pretty adorable. Chanhyuk can feel how a warm, loving smile spreads on his face.

When Jeyou finally speaks, it’s a soft, quiet stammer, his gaze flitting back and forth between Chanhyuk’s face and the ground.

“But I… I thought Chihoon-hyung… and you- you were-”

“No. You developed that idea and I didn’t stop you because it was easier than telling you that I’ve been in love with you for at least a year now.”

Chanhyuk’s voice is so gentle, he’s almost a bit surprised at himself. But his words seem to have the desired effect when Jeyou’s smile widens, the anxious expression in his eyes slowly fading away and getting replaced by his usual happy sparkle. With his heart beating ten times faster than normally, Chanhyuk watches how the younger takes a careful step forward, closing the distance between them.

“Can you kiss me?” Jeyou whispers, sounding unbelievable quiet and shy. It’s such a stark contrast to the usual energetic and bright personality he shows to everyone, and Chanhyuk can’t stop himself from letting out a little laugh.

“Yes.” He answers, a wide grin on his face. And then he’s leaning down, his eyes falling shut when their lips finally touch. His hands settle on Jeyou’s waist, pulling him closer, and the younger lets out a little giggle when he stumbles forward.

Their lips move softly against each other, the kiss slow and languid. Jeyou’s body feels warm against his, the younger’s left hand wandering up to his shoulder and finding purchase on Chanhyuk’s shirt. The space between them is almost nonexistent at this point, bodies touching from head to toe. The closeness is dizzying and the feeling of finally being able to kiss Jeyou sends Chanhyuk’s head spinning.

Not being able to stop himself, he lets his hands wander, from Jeyou’s waist to his hips and then under his shirt and to his back where they stay to draw little patterns on the younger’s skin. Jeyou’s only reaction is a soft little whine from the back of his throat and a teasing bite to the older’s bottom lip before he practically melts into Chanhyuk’s hands. Chanhyuk can’t help but let out a laugh at that, a soft puff of air interrupting their kiss for a moment before their lips find one another again, tongues exploring each other’s mouths this time.

The contact sends a thrill through Chanhyuk, his whole body feeling warm and tingly, his heart beating loudly in his chest. The only thought on his mind is that this is _right_.

Kissing Jeyou is everything Chanhyuk ever wanted and more, and he’s reluctant to pull away, only doing so when it gets hard to breathe. Jeyou seems to feel the same, a small, displeased sound leaving his mouth when they part. For a moment, he frowns, lips protruding in a little pout before he smiles brightly up at Chanhyuk.

“That was nice.” He says, tone pleased and happy, a warm twinkle in his eyes. Taking a step back, his hand wanders from Chanhyuk’s shoulder down to his palm, and then, he’s interlacing their fingers, his smile turning more shy and bashful. He looks so unbelievable beautiful, brown hair tousled, a soft blush on his cheeks, eyes sparkling in the low light, expression filled with nothing but contentment, joy, and love. The sight is ethereal and Chanhyuk still can’t quite believe that Jeyou’s really here, in his arms.

“Was it?” He finally replies, teasing voice just barely above a whisper in the small space between them. Lips twitching up in a little grin, he winks at Jeyou, watching how the younger rolls his eyes and lets out a short annoyed huff that would’ve been more believable if his gaze wasn’t filled with fondness.

“God, I really do love you, but sometimes you should just shut up.” Jeyou mumbles before he raises himself up on his tiptoes to press another kiss to Chanhyuk’s lips.

And there it is again. The word _L_ _ove_. Chanhyuk didn’t really register it the first time because they were both troubled with other emotions just a few minutes ago, but now it really sinks in. Jeyou’s in love with him. He loves Chanhyuk in the same way Chanhyuk loves him. He can’t help but let out a laugh at the thought that forms in his head after that realization. When Jeyou sends him a questioning look, he just shrugs.

“Our friends are going to be really smug when I tell them they were right.”


End file.
